In university, I studied a concept called symbolic interactionism (SI). It was an evolutionary and revolutionary reframing of the fundamental worldview in the “science” of sociology.

The discipline of sociology started its’ explorations in the early 20th century based on a normative world view. That means, sociology aimed to understand humans and society through the impact of culture, social structure, and socialization on individuals and society.

I apologize if that is too academic. I realize it certainly is dry. Simply put, sociologists believed most humans act the way they do due to external forces that had influenced and molded them: where they were raised, how they were raised, what they learned and internalized from the world around them. In short, people usually acted in accordance with how people around them behaved. “To be normal.” “To fit in.”

My studies focused on this crossover evolution in sociology from a “normative” paradigm to a emerging and more individually centered theory of “symbolic interactionism.”

Symbolic interactionism posits that individuals form their ideas and act in concert with their personal interpretation of the world around them. Those interpretations influence their behavior and life choices more than what is expected from them as they grow up.

Think how you might answer a set of questions like this: What is a home? What is the definition of a good person? Create a list of animals that are good to eat.

Depending on your personal experience, the answer to those questions will differ widely. And how you feel and think about them will influence how you behave in the world.

To understand society and how it operates, the SI argument goes that you must understand how individuals personally interpret what is going on around them. They make life choices and decisions according to those beliefs.

If your home experience was full of joy, fun and excitement, you will seek that out in your life and recreate it when you are able. But if home wasn’t a “happy place,” it may be hard to know how to start making a “happy home” yourself. For one thing, you likely don’t have a clue how.

I am thinking of this these days in the wake of the rape of the old oak forest behind us. The builder isn’t doing anything “wrong” per se and certainly not illegal. But morally? Ethically? The answers to those questions are harder to answer. According to who?

I realize that I see what he is doing in vastly different terms than he does. He did not see the value of the old trees. He does not care about destroying the peace and tranquillity his neighbors formerly enjoyed. He sees a fun-filled, happy future for himself and his family.

Like many life experiences, how we see something is influenced by how we have personally experienced it. There are many universal experiences we can relate to with others, but the actual experience is different for each person.

We can all empathize with someone who is “going through something.” Especially if we have gone through it ourselves. Marriage. Childbirth. Divorce. Death of someone close. Failure. And success. But we cannot experience exactly what someone else is experiencing. We are all inherently alone.

I feel stronger than ever about the affirmative need for humans to follow their individual dictates and passion. Everyone – and I mean everyone – around you at various times in your life will have an opinion about what is best for you, what should and could work, whether a step you are taking is wise or not. Especially when you are young.

As we get older and stronger and more comfortable with our own views and perception of the world, those internal dictates should by then be better understood and adhered to. The succinct advice to “pursue your bliss” evens the odds of fulfillment and happiness in your pwn life. In the end and at the end of our lives, it will be all that mattered.

The biggest errors of judgment I made in my life were because I ignored the dictates of the “small, still voice” deep inside. Sometimes, in fact, it was neither small nor still. It shrieked at me like a banshee. I still didn’t listen. And I paid a very high price because I didn’t.

In light of the current environmental inconvenience and distress we are going through in our home environment, I am trying to rely on the messages coming from my own internal dictates and direction. I have already made some choices. I will make more. My future direction and plans are changing in light of this development.

This was to be our “forever” home. Turns out it is just another pit stop. Change of plan. It happens. The private, deep-seated grief I am experiencing is mine and mine alone.

As it always is.